And now back to “Keeping Up with the Targaryens”!

“Hello everyone! I’m back from the market!”

[audience applause]

“Greetings, khaleesi. You look troubled. Is something amiss?”

“Oh it’s nothing, Ser Mormont. It’s just these Qartheen clothes I have to wear. They’re so loose-fitting and sheer.”

“Indeed. They are quite different from your old Dothraki war skins.”

“Yeah! Except now the only skin people see is yours, Mommy!”

[audience laughter]

“Drogon, you little scamp! What have you and your brothers been up to all day?”

“Well, Viserion and Rhaegal went off to hunt some rats for lunch. But I stayed indoors and had a hot dog instead!”

“A hot dog? What on earth is a hot dog, my child?”

“Go see for yourself! It’s bones are still smoking out in the courtyard!”

[audience laughter]

“By the way, if Xaro Xhoan Daxos comes around looking for his pet, tell him I’m not here.”

[audience laughter]

“Oh, Drogon! How are we to amass a force large enough to take back Westeros if you keep burning and devouring everything?”

“Your mother speaks wisdom, little hatchling. Now that Robert Baratheon is gone, we will need the help and trust of many to overthrow his heir.”

“Don’t worry, Jorah! When we get to Westeros, I’m gonna be big and strong with big black wings! Then I can overthrow all the air!”

[audience coo of adoration]

“I’m certain you will, my child. I foresee you making your mother a very proud queen indeed.”

“But Mommy! Who will be your king? I know! How about Jorah!”

[audience hooting]

“I, uh… that is to say…”

“Don’t be silly, Drogon. I’m much too young for Ser Mormont.”

“You’re right, Mommy. If you married Jorah then he wouldn’t have time to watch for assassins from inside your closet while you take baths!”

“Why you little…”

[audience laughter]

Next week on “Keeping Up with the Targaryens”, the gang gets a surprise visit from guest star, Ted Danson!

“Dothraki Takeout delivery! Got a steaming raw horse heart for someone named Dany?”

“I’ll sign for that!”

“Holy crap! A talking dragon!”

ΒΆ Dragon Momma at 604Republic